Good Enough Lens

I've really been pondering on the idea of being "good enough" lately. What constitutes being "good enough" and why are so many scales of this skewed? This is a very sensitive topic for some because it can be a life-long self battle of sorts.

One of the main reasons why this topic has been on my mind is because of my lovely supervisor L. L. is not afraid to tell me her opinion but at the same time doesn't force it upon me. She'll do anything she can to help me improve and grow. Basically she's the best :) Recently we were having a talk about confidence and my subtle lack of it. I intend to enter the field of business one day and we were talking about the fact that to be successful you have to have confidence in yourself and your ability to improve the lives of others. You have to know that you are capable of making a difference. As simple a concept as this is, it is so hard to embrace. And it isn't something you gain overnight, you have to work towards it. 

The gist of our conversation was basically that I needed to not doubt myself. I needed to trust myself and trust that I have had experiences through school and my personal life that have prepared me for this present moment and I am capable of achieving great things if I but apply myself. Maybe it is just natural tendency speaking but I found it hard to see myself as a "game-changer", a "difference maker", an "impact for good". These seem like hefty titles for a college freshman. 

But even more baffling to me was the fact that L. could explain this to me with such conviction while I sat in somewhat disbelief. What was the difference between our perspectives?

Maybe the difference is the same difference I experience when I try to explain to someone why they shouldn't give up, why they are worth something great. Distance gives us perspective, and so does experience.

Another reason this has been on my mind is because of my friend D. D recently challenged me and my FHE group (LDS thing) to create semester goals for ourselves in the categories of Mental, Physical and Spiritual. For my Mental goal I said I wanted to learn the concepts in my Economics class so well that I could explain them to others and get an "A" overall in the class. Seems a little silly right? Yes maybe, but here's my reasoning: I'm terrified for this class. It is one of the most failed courses at my college. And I have to do well in it to get into the business school. The pressure is on. Yes, I have other classes I need to do well in, but I've set my sights on this one in particular. For some reason I have this gut feeling that if I can achieve this goal then my self-confidence will increase. I will know personally that I can do something hard and that I will gain skills that will later help me help others.

Bringing this all back around to the original point, I feel like this inner "good enough" meter is directly connected to the amount of self-confidence we feel. You can pretend things all you want but the harsh reality is the inner-peace we feel towards ourselves is our guiding star. But rather than end on a negative note I'd like to say that we can all increase our self-confidence and become a better self. Baby steps my friends. They are absolutely necessary. Best wishes and I'd love to hear your personal take on this or any inspiring stories. Much love!

-M

January Lens

I've been as good about writing on here lately as I have in my journal (except I haven't written in my journal since August). Many good things in life have come and gone since the last time I wrote. In the end I think they all boil down to one thing: life is good, God is good, and life moves on. Let's peruse uninteresting facts about my life shall we?

My first semester at college ended and I did better than expected. Someone up above was really watching out for me. I don't confess to be knowledgeable when it comes down to it, I just know where to look for wisdom and knowledge. Another good thing about the semester is that I really enjoyed my professors. I don't think people are always as lucky as I am to get along incredibly well with those who are trying to supply me with useful knowledge.

Now that a new semester has started I can put last semester behind me and move on to a new, bright semester. It will be hard, lets be real here, but I'm excited about all the opportunities it will bring. I just have to keep telling myself that this semester will be great, even when I'm at the height of business and stress (please remind me of this every few weeks ok? thanks).

I saw my family over the break. I think separation really does make people draw closer together. I don't mean this to sound harsh but I think I was more excited to see my family and get along with them because I hadn't seen them in a while. Distance is God's way of giving us perspective.

Many friends and acquaintances have received mission calls and/or left for their missions. What a cool experience to see so many people dedicate their lives to their choice of service. I know many people outside the LDS faith dislike having the "Mormon Missionaries" knocking on their doors but I think it is just a misunderstanding. These missionaries are just trying to share something that makes them happy with others. Same as any other religion that sends out missionaries. I'm not saying people who don't invite missionaries into their homes are bad people, I just think we could all do better at understanding each other a little better.

I know there are more aspects of my life that have been good but I'm tired and I think you all now know more about me and my opinion than you ever needed to. ;) So let me know about the good you've all seen in life lately.

-M